Being my mother’s son has not always been easy. We didn’t see eye to eye on so many things when I was growing up. The relationship that I had with my mother was one of the reasons that I moved away in the first place. However, through the last ten to fifteen years, we have grown closer and she actually moved within a few miles of me several years ago.
Now it seems that she needs a caregiver as her health and strength have become an issue. She can still get around pretty well, but she has trouble from time to time. She asked if I would be her caregiver and I’m torn.
On the one hand, I know that being a home care provider is an important job and I simply don’t have any direct experience with this level of care. On the other hand, it would give me and my mother an opportunity to spend more time together, even if it’s just a couple of days a week.
This was my dilemma, so I began to write down the pros and cons of being her caregiver. I ended up with quite a list of things to think about, ponder, and consider.
The more important pro of providing home care for my mother would be that I would spend more time with her. We would be able to talk and get to know each other better. Another advantage to me providing home care for her would be that I would know that she’s getting what she needs every day.
One of the most concerning disadvantages to being her caregiver would involve any personal needs of her, including toiletry needs. She is my mother and that would be a bit uncomfortable for me and for her, I believe. She doesn’t have any problems now, but who knows what next year would bring.
Also, I would be giving up some of my personal time in order to care for her, and this is an unknown because I just don’t know how much time I would be sacrificing to care for her.
I decided to be her caregiver for now, but we established limits. At some point, she may require a professional in-home care provider to fulfill all of her needs, but in the meantime, I think it could be good for us.
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